My two year old boy has recently become captivated by the amazing Spiderman. His favorite thing to do is wear his Spiderman costume, stand on the top of our couch with his fingers in the Spiderman hand gesture, and then jump off yelling, "I'm Spiderman!"
To me, he is the real Spiderman, but in reality there is one major and very important difference between my son and "The Spiderman" and that is the spider web. The real Spiderman doesn't just jump off the couch, he has super webs that come out of his wrist and attach onto things all around him, helping him swing from one place to another.
There is something else that is also important for Spiderman to be successful but something we don't always think of, and that is the environment around him. The buildings, the trees, the walls, everything that he attaches himself to, is needed in order for him to be able to maneuver around. Without these structures, or these bigger things, Spiderman wouldn't be very successful.
Even though these things help Spiderman greatly, I realized in the latest Spiderman movie, that these things can also be the cause of great harm to him. Buildings fall, walls crumble and trees break. In order to prevent harm, sometimes Spiderman has to let go of these things and get out of their way to prevent getting hurt by them.
The tasks on the list that I shared in my previous post, that have helped me live a little more, are much like the bigger things in the environment that Spiderman needs.
These things are bigger than myself and provide me with the support I need to face the challenges of life.... and yet, they can be the cause of great harm. People can be cruel, nature can destroy, our bodies can cease to function properly, our dreams can let us down, we can suffer loss, and our fears can cripple us. These experiences that we have sometimes make us let go of these supports... and that is okay.
I am here to tell you that as a teenager, I needed a break from most of the bigger supports in my life to find a new one that would also be a blessing to me.
I am also here to testify that we can come back.... when we are ready, to those supports we lost. We can let them become a part of our lives again. The more connections I have to bigger things, the more alive I feel.
Below I have included links to the items on my list and by clicking on the links you will be able to see my experience with each of them and how they have helped me with my depression and anxiety.
I need to note that developing these habits can require a lot of effort and I needed to do them individually to prevent myself from getting overwhelmed. I also had to be patient with myself. If I didn't get to it one day or, or one week, or one month, I made new goals, but I had to be nice to myself. Gradually, I received a quiet manifestation within me for each that what I was doing was good.
There are many other supports that I have not discussed below. Some of them include meditation, meaningful values, meaningful work, God (this one I will discuss soon), and many more. There is a book that I am in the process of reading called Lost Connections by Johann Hari and I would recommend it to anyone struggling with depression. It talks about the most common disconnections we experience in life, and how to find those connections again.
Overall, these habits combined with cognitive behavioral therapy have made me a more patient, loving and compassionate person towards others and myself. I am more confident, I feel less alone and I am more grateful for the life I have. I am less crippled by my fears and more empowered by them. I recover much quicker when I fail at something and I am more curious about the world. I am living.... a good life.
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